Today I find myself stealing glances at my friend because I just realised something's changed, I can't quite put my finger to it. I don't know if it's the random hugs or the unconscious compliments being thrown in my direction. Maybe it's the subtle aura I get from her, like the fragrance of freshly baked goods, subtle in it's scent yet alluring.
I find myself, thinking and pondering on what could have possibly triggered this change I'm sensing. Something pivotal? This is the thought running through my mind.
This reminds me of the early days of our friendship, when she was often the stiff one.
It was so bad that when she responded to a goodbye hug from me, she would hug me almost without our bodies touching which is weird for ladies as we are very touchy feely especially with hugs. She would also do this stuff which at the time came off as really weird for me. She would pat me on the back, like the kind of pat a mentor gives a mentee after doing a good job or the way guys greet each other. Weird right?
At the time, I must say, one could almost refer to her as "masculine ". Not that she meant to give off that vibe but she just wasn't conscious of projecting her feminine side.
Years have gone by and of course her present self is so different from her past self. Her hugs are sweeter and most of the time, she's more feminine and it's not just in the actions, even the aura around her broadcasts "female, sweet" as opposed to the initial stage.
When others started commenting on it, they too wondered what changed. What could have triggered this difference in her? Often times, I'm caught taking some of the credit as I've been accused by her of being too feminine and spending so much time around me plus constant corrections, it does feel like I had a part to play in this change.
When we resumed school for the year, I had to come to terms with the fact that my once stiff friend had changed and is no longer as stiff as she used to be.
I realised that sometimes whether you're conscious of it or not, whether you're prepared or well planned for change or not, it's important to note when something pivotal has happened to someone that brings about a change.
I call it the tipping point.
You may not get the opportunity to notice when that tipping moment occurs but know that a time comes in a person's life when a tipping moment occurs.
Suddenly you look up and you realise you're not the same person you were before, you realise the things you used to enjoy seem less fun. That which you placed value on no longer has worth to you.
Reminds me of the story of Abraham, once upon upon time, was called, "Abram" regular ole married man just living his life. Some chapters after and voila! Now referred to as, "Abraham, Father of many Nations".
Makes you realise that there are tipping points like that in life, in your life and even in the lives of your loved ones that leaves them different than they used to be or than you thought them to be.
The aim isn't to pretend like no change has occurred or act like all is as it used to be. No, I realised that if you must maximise and make the most of your relationships, of the resources in your life, you must come to recognise that there will come tipping moments that you cannot run from or evade.
My mentor would always tell me, "wisdom is recognising the difference in people".
I couldn't agree more, it's wisdom to know that I'm different than I used to be, the world is different than it used to be. It's wisdom to come to terms with that truth and accept it.
If you do not accept that something is different or that a change has occurred, you will find yourself trying to run with an outdated version of something or a someone. The more force you apply to sustain the past, the more empty it all looks because the person you knew then or what you knew before no longer exists.
Tipping points exist, whether we are conscious of it or not, recognise the wave of change that comes after moments like that, embrace that change and build again from there.
Truth is We, the world, is constantly evolving, changing, growing and moving and you can't stay stuck, relating with the past versions of life. You must come to terms with the new man that breaks forth out of every tipping point.
For it is this truth that you know that will set you free!