Recently, a friend was sharing his breakup story. I won't go into details but suffice it to say, at the end, both parties agreed to just stay, "friends". I found that sad as I don't like it when relationships, especially the good kind comes to an end and I was quick to voice that. However like the popular saying, "What goes for the Gander may not go for the Goose" so I had to let them be.
There was however a striking thing I said, which I must say I've learnt at the feet of a relationship I didn't see coming that means a lot to me. Please don't get one-tracked in your thinking, it may or may not involve a man, lol.
The attitude in which you start something matters a whole lot. In fact, it's that attitude that will sustain what you hope to build especially in the trying moments.
This reminds me a lot about my family and one time when my sister and I had a huge row. It's not something I like to remember but nonetheless, I have to share.
I remember this was just after I'd finished high school and it felt like I was on the cusp of independence. My sister was currently serving at the time. We had just gotten back home after spending a month or so in Enugu state where she was finishing up her NYSC. Everyone was cool and chill but it was like when we all came home, a switch went off in our heads. Honestly, if you tell me it's village people, I just might agree with you, lol.
We had stayed in each other's company for a month with no issues, suddenly we come home, and it's like battle for the apes or something. What triggered the argument was so trivial that it still makes me shake my head in amazement whenever I remember.
I still don't know how I survived that season as I usually feel the backlash more when a loved one was hurt by me. We later settled of course, but it will always be one memory I forever regret. This memory however reminds me of the irrefutable bond of blood that ties us together as a family. A bond that no matter what, cannot be broken.
I've no doubt that at one instance or another you must have had a serious argument with an immediate family that ended up spiraling out of control and you must have thought, "I'm done with this lot". Yet, here you are, still family. You've all moved on from that negative experience. Why? Because, you know that family is family and no matter what, you're all in this together.
There's this popular slang in Nigeria, "We die here" and it's used to express a die hard attitude, a come what may we will always push through or no matter what happens we will still be standing together, no giving up. Like what happens with family, where no matter the quarrels, arguments or disagreements, we never stop being family. It's an experience that informs the kind of attitude you should adopt.
I realised that our attitude has a part to play in our success story. I mean what's a winner without a winning attitude? What's a wealthy man without a wealthy attitude? If you have an attitude of "we die here," that is; come what may you will still be here pushing the dream, treading the path. Then, no matter what comes you will stand firm through it.
Be intentional in the kind of attitude you begin a venture with. It could be a business, a career or even a relationship, especially relationships. If you have an attitude of, 'If it gets bad, I can leave' then it will most likely get bad and you will quit. Don't have a quitting attitude, don't even apply it to life or you will quit at everything you do.
Remember Esther, the Queen? She dropped a quote that we tend to use a lot in fellowship. "If I perish, I perish ". That statement was honed from an iron-clad attitude of, "We die here" and no matter the fear at approaching the King unannounced she still pushed through with it and gained her victory.
There's an attitude for a King, there's an attitude for a warrior, there's an attitude for a champion. it's about time you tapped into the fierceness of an ever raging die-hard attitude and watch that business, career or relationship flourish.
There's an attitude for the Palace. Pace it, Manifest it!